No. 65 – Trusting

No. 65 – Trusting

Dear One,

With intention of sharing illuminating, alleviating, and elevating ideas for y-o-u, here’s ‘Trusting.’

Ever felt life’s rolling along and then, boom…? 

Your close-in-heart relationship hits rocky ground.  Or disappears.

An illness like Lyme arrives stymying doctors and you for months.  Or years.  

It’s hand-unseen-in-front-of face dark.  Without a seeming path through, awareness of what’s next, nor knowledge of tomorrow’s next best step – let alone in 10 minutes.

Trusting, in times like these, feels fleeting – at best.  

Holding “a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something,” per New Oxford American Dictionary, can feel – straight-up impossible.

With tides of difficulty rolling in, Trusting can go rolling on out.

Have you felt negligible Trust, if any, in the Divine, helpers, or others, and, by appearances, your likelihood of a turnaround is a looooooong shot (if even)? 

If you’ve heard something like I did, that you’re a ‘lost cause’ implied by a doctor to family while sitting there stunned, you perhaps big ole doubted.  

When a non-traditional treatment and a rock star therapist entered my life and my spouse chose Trusting, I was still, frankly, not.  

Maybe you feel Trusting kinda seems a joke; perhaps .00001% has faith you’ll make it through or heal.

How on earth do you get to Trusting from this type of place?

Well, incrementally, you could consider, mull, and then decide – to double down on Trusting.  In what’s not seen, believed, or felt.  

Praying, reading, persisting, sharing, asking, deciding, admitting, meditating, listening, noticing, releasing, honest-ing, surrendering.  Ways like this, rather consistently and imperfectly can lead, ultimately, to Trusting.

Nanometer by nanometer, experimenting and risking building Trust with others, in the Almighty, angels, saints, and the Holies.  

If it worked for me, it can work for dear you.  

Like when and an earth angel, Peter (name respectfully changed), reminded me of Trusting’s import and value.

Upon Pup’s bark towards the door – twice no less – to get my attention, which she’d not done ever, I thought, hmmmm odd, and to the door, I went.

Opening it, a partial mega large delivery lay at feet.  DHL Peter, on his phone, stood by his truck in street, peering at packages.  Confusion written on his face.

Offered greetings which he reciprocated, he then indicated 1 more large item remained.

Briskly carrying it up, gut knowing sensed he ‘twas ok. 

Having already carried in the first same ugh-heavy item, I asked if he’d put #2 inside our door.  FYI – near always, locks are on and strangers aren’t let in.  He kindly agreed after asking if it was ok. Yup.  (Trusting).

As he lay package #2 down, scanning it, tears began.  Not pretty wee tears, these were heavy, makeup running ones.  I’m thinking, what-is-going-on?

Immediately, Peter looks up.  Without pausing, he queries to pray.  Rivulets already begun, voice lost temporarily, nodding follows.  Without hesitation, he begins, while my eye leaks continue.  After a decade-plus of Lyme and myriad issues, what’s the point in pretending? 

He commences praying like ‘tis his job.  Which, at that moment, I believe it was.  Trusting.  Me to knees, him believing.  By the front door, on a regular Tuesday.   Praying for a difficult matter a friend was experiencing which was beyond my control and in Other’s hands. 

After relief flooded, we walked to the truck, briefly sharing our own prior miracles partly due to Trusting.  Hugging, gratitude-ing, appreciating, reminding each other to Eyes on the Light – no matter what.  

From Peter’s Trusting and reminder, Trusting within me followed suit after receiving just what was needed and right on time.  

So perhaps consider “Trust because you are willing to accept the risk, not because it is safe or certain.”  (Anonymous)

When you decide for Trusting, dear one, even with chips down and dark closing in, beauty can arrive. Deliriously surprising yet repeatedly happening, the Divine can move in ways few humans imagine.  With Trusting.  Even a little bit.  Even when chunks of you holler – Nope. 

Before wrapping, another curiosity.  Peter’s scanner failed momentarily; it’s evidently usually dandy. He glanced up and saw me standing there hence deciding to scan the ‘like’ package instead of departing for a ‘fix’ which made our meeting occur.  Plus, the pup never made another peep.  

Perhaps ponder Trusting, a gem of an idea that may pay off for you in spades. 

Sending you mega love beams and prayers for more Trusting plus a standing O to precious Peter,